The aim is both to address current malaise and to undercut toxic substitution behaviors (such as authoritarian fanaticism) by offering a healthier lifestyle, thus strengthening Comind.
Humanity and its recent ancestral species have spent the vast majority of their existence organized into small groups. The brief time outside this structure is too short to have influenced our genome significantly. Consequently, we have a psychology suited to this mode of life. Those who have experienced living in a balanced group of this kind know how indescribably satisfying it can be.
Warnings:
Numerous disorders and substitution behaviors can be observed as a result of departing from this mode of life:
This involves admiring someone who does not know us and attributing power to them. This could be an artist whose look or behaviors we emulate, a politician we follow unquestioningly, a sportsperson, etc.
The benefit of this behavior is creating a sense of love and belonging by synchronizing one's behavior with the idolized person and their group of fans. Belonging to this fantasized group empowers individuals and provides them with a form of identity.
This is a derivative form of human groups but often part-time and with partial commitment. It is a fairly strong relationship but weaker compared to older forms where people were bonded by vital necessities. People who have experienced moments of survival-based mutual aid with strangers rediscover this strong bond.
Friendship (highly enjoyable!) is an intermediary between ancient group life and isolated living. It has one big advantage over isolated living. However, it is a diminished version, with less commitment , where one can opt to disengage and explore other relationships instead of resolving issues. This tension between frustration over managing problematic links and moving on is complex, and we will explore it below.
This involves suppressing awareness of fears and other socially repressed emotions. A classic example is entering an elevator with your boss. The boss could fire you, so it's natural to feel fear, but they often pressure you to appear optimistic and enthusiastic. Years of such double play can suppress feelings. However, they may resurface during anxiety attacks or other forms of crisis (such as burn-out).
Suppressing emotions is an exhausting task requiring constant energy. For example, one must suppress childhood fears, distract oneself with Netflix, etc. Simple exercises like resting your mind to feel emotions become impossible.
Books like Alice Miller's For Your Own Good
can help reconnect with emotions.
This involves immersing oneself in fictional environments (dreamlike or gaming) more as an escape than for pleasure. The benefit is experiencing emotions different from the sense of being stuck in one's life. For example, a team-based war game may offer the experience of a bonded group and evoke emotions otherwise suppressed.
This involves using drugs legal or not to dull awareness of problems stemming from a destructive social environment.
This involves adhering to the provided social model, such as accepting the dominant ideology, participating in prescribed activities (supporting the local sports team, watching TV, consumerism, etc.).
The advantage is gaining a sense of group belonging, self-esteem through media-disseminated values, and escaping social contradictions.
How can we currently replace the benefits of life in small groups, like in the time of hunter-gatherers ?
Almost all of us have faced this dilemma: should we break ties (friendship, love, collaboration, etc.) with a certain person. Choosing to break off the relationship offers a simple solution to a problematic relationship, provides more openness to creating new relationships, but ends a relationship in failure. Choosing to maintain the relationship avoids ending it in failure, offers the possibility of improvement, but may become alienating.
This is not about advocating one choice over the other, as depending on the context, either might be the right choice. We will study the social context that leads to favoring one choice over the other and the social consequences this entails. The aim is not to push one choice but to change the social context in order to make human relationships happier.
| Aspect | Tendency towards breakup | Tendency towards long-term relationship |
|---|---|---|
| Personal growth through openness to a greater diversity of people | + | - |
| Leaving a relationship that could be harmful | + | - |
| Exercising the ability to improve the relationship, thereby understanding oneself and others | - | + |
| Aspect | Ancient society | Modern society | Comind society |
|---|---|---|---|
| Contact with non-social reality | + | - | - but + compared to modern society |
| Outsourcing of intelligence | - | + | + but - compared to modern society |
| Objectification of people | - | + | + but - compared to modern society |
| Fluidity | - | + | + |
| Specialization | - | + | + but - compared to modern society |
We can note a similarity in the two comparative tables between ancient and modern society: a decrease in long-term bonds and a decrease in the necessity of intelligence. Yet, achieving social change (such as restoring the qualities of group life) is only possible if the framework aligns. The orientation towards short-term relationships and the outsourcing of intelligence is a significant force against group life.
Comind inherently promotes stronger long-term bonds and a need to develop intelligence due to participation in collective decision-making in an efficiency-stimulating form. It is, therefore, a society in synergy with group life. This is why it is important to associate the necessary social context changes with the Comind movement.
It is the richness of activity, the importance of activities, and the strength of commitment that makes one feel involved in a group. For example, a group of friends with only festive activities will be weaker than one with multiple activities, such as discussing emotions, society, partying, engaging in political or sports activities, etc.
Fluidity means that outside of existing activities (like work with very little hierarchy), there is no opportunity to form a deep bond with a group. This is why it is necessary to create an artificiality.
Our mindset, focused on fluidity and consumption, pushes us to look for the "perfect match". But here, the goal is not to have the most efficient group from the start. On the contrary, it is about enhancing one’s ability to evolve and understand. Therefore, it is not the state of the group that matters but the journey it takes. It is thus not important to select matching individuals but rather to understand that we all broadly share the same genetic code and that our minds are flexible enough to evolve pleasantly.
Life experiences within families and different groups show that we often encounter painful blockages. This is even stronger when the basic context encourages breaking off ties. To address this, Comind can offer two aids:
It is neither possible nor desirable to force people. However, it is possible to refuse new entries. Groups can be created where a person has no choice in the group and can never change it. They can leave, but this means renouncing Comind groups. This may seem unpleasant given our culture, but it also ensures:
It is important for the group to have stakes to avoid operating "empty". This could involve managing a café, a shop, etc. There could also be a mandatory shared fund (e.g., $10 per person per month) to support activities.
Far from pushing a specific mode of operation, groups should have full freedom to organize and decide their activities. Only a few rules to prevent blockages and resolve certain situations would be necessary. Such as:
In a New York neighborhood, there are enough interested individuals to form a group. After creation, they decide to follow a proposed start-up protocol (among others): the smooth start-up. It includes rules like:
And initial activities, such as:
By creating a new form of group, associated with and supported by Comind. See the study for the description.